ready to go, scared to leave.

it's been an interesting few days at Valpo. some people, i guess, thought i was never coming back. others thought i was leaving a lot sooner than i actually am. still others have been sufficiently strange about my being here... for a week. also, i've spent the last week lugging around a comforter (cleverly disguised in a basketball duffel) and the last six nights in three different places (only to add a fourth tonight). i guess now i'm just glad i'll have a bed (with sheets!) when i get to Reutlingen.

i'm actually bummed that i won't be here this semester, for all the nerdiest reasons. i happen to think Valpo's new president is the coolest guy ever. he's holding office hours in Jester's next week and i'm sad i won't be able to go. also, i really want to get back into taking art classes. i love my major. i just can't wait to do my art homework. i'm bringing my sketchbooks and about a million pencils, so i'll be able to at least draw while i'm gone, but there are so many other things i'm excited to do in classes, and i have to wait until January.

i've gradually been saying bye to everyone. everyone expects me to be so excited, but i'm so scared right now. i know i'm going to have an amazing time, but it's hard to think about that right now with about 24 hours of travel and a completely different culture right around the corner. i'm also sad i won't see my family for over three months. but i'm getting used to it. i just ran into Courtney; she's the only person who's been ok with me not being super excited right now. it felt really good to talk to her about it, because she's far from home when she's at valpo. so she knows how i feel, sort of. it's hard to be away. and as courtney said, "now you just have to go."

so i'm just going.